I've been pinning to my Christmas board so much my thumbs are sore. I am ready to make garland from dried fruit, to create fancy-pants hand-lettered place settings for the family meal, to craft homemade bath bombs and package them in hand-frosted mason jars. I'm like Martha Stewart up in here. Imagine my glee when I found a way to make Christmas ornaments from peppermints... and then imagine my horror when it all went wrong. So, so wrong.

I found a pin to this project from Hello Homebody--you can create stunning ornaments by baking starlight mints in the oven. All you need is an oven, a baking tray, non-stick spray, parchment paper, metal cookie cutters... and a degree in wizardry because this deceptively simple project was more than I could handle.

I followed the recipe to a T. I'm a stickler for following the rules, so I didn't deviate from the method used to transform gross peppermint discs into gorgeous peppermint ornaments.

I'll even make like Algebra II and show my proof. (LOL, math joke! What? I'm kind of a nerd, but whatever. I own it.)

I looked everywhere for these peppermints, BTW. I thought they would be with the Christmas candy, but NOPE. Had to spend a solid five minutes hunting them down on the regular candy aisle. (Meg Summers/TSM)
I looked everywhere for these peppermints, BTW. I thought they would be with the Christmas candy, but NOPE. Had to spend a solid five minutes hunting them down on the regular candy aisle. (Meg Summers/TSM)
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I meticulously arranged my mints in their molds, already thrilled thinking of how adorable the finished product would be. If only I had known... (Meg Summers/TSM)
I meticulously arranged my mints in their molds, already thrilled thinking of how adorable the finished product would be. If only I had known... (Meg Summers/TSM)
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I waited five minutes, as my oven is old and wonky and weird--and I need a new one desperately (Hey, Santa, Hey!). Things tend to bake faster in my dinosaur of an oven, so I knew I needed to get my mints out sooner rather than later. I was prepared to see success. I was ready to be amazed. and here's what I got...

It was all I could do not to hurl this tray across the kitchen, but it was hot--and I didn't want to be burned twice. (Meg Summers/TSM)
It was all I could do not to hurl this tray across the kitchen, but it was hot--and I didn't want to be burned twice. (Meg Summers/TSM)
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It was LITERALLY a hot mess. I don't know if you can tell from the photo above, but in addition to being Pepto-pink blobs of bland, they were bubbling over. My ornaments were a complete and utter failure.

I let them cool and then attempted to remove them from their cookie cutter molds. This was easier said than done. They cracked into pieces, and they were strangely sticky.

Nothing says 'Happy Holidays' like a tray full of bitter disappointment! (Meg Summers/TSM)
Nothing says 'Happy Holidays' like a tray full of bitter disappointment! (Meg Summers/TSM)
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Out of the six I made, two were somewhat salvageable.

Have you ever seen a more depressing Christmas ornament? My toddler brings home better-looking stuff from preschool, and SHE IS TWO. (Meg Summers/TSM)
Have you ever seen a more depressing Christmas ornament? My toddler brings home better-looking stuff from preschool, and SHE IS TWO. (Meg Summers/TSM)
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The only one that looked halfway decent broke the instant I tried to remove it from the mold. (Meg Summers/TSM)
The only one that looked halfway decent broke the instant I tried to remove it from the mold. (Meg Summers/TSM)
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I suppose I could try this again and bake the mints for 2.5 minutes--maybe that would work. Or I could just buy my Christmas ornaments. That sounds good.

In the meantime, I'll stick to real baking. I'm good at that.

 

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